I can't believe what's happening.
I just got back from visiting the local SPCA.
My wife is somehow brain-washing me into thinking we need a dog!!!
It took me 9 years to get rid of our first one - it was a Dalmatian.
It had a seizure disorder and lost all bodily fluids once a month.
It took me 9 weeks to get rid of our second one - Miniature dachshund.
He chewed up all my daughters favorite dolls heads... and peed every place but outside.
It's my twin daughters 11th birthday and my wife thinks we need to get them a dog.
By the way... if you girls are reading this I want you to act surprised if I get persuaded to actually get you a dog... OK?!
She [my wife] has got me fully reeled into her delusion and I even said what 'breed' we should be looking for!!!
Golden Retriever
Send help.
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